...spin me a web...

mmm i'm going to ask boy to prom tomorrow. i have to—i promised my friend that i would. and also i'm getting really flipping sick of my cowardice. buck up, anouk. plus, the longer i wait and dawdle, the more likely that someone else will ask him blah blah blah. for all i know he already is going with someone else. oh well. fuckit. i'll ask him anyways. because i [heart] him. i'm just going to ask him as friends, though. because i think he has a girlfriend. [sigh].


hot damn i love spiderman 2. and spiderman 1. i haven't seen the movie since it was in theaters (when i saw spidey2 three, count 'em, three, times), but i've read the novelization (damn good book) and listened to the soundtrack a gazillion times. it's good. >.>


a boy on the bus today pulled my hair. a boy i'm friends with. he hardly pulled it, really. just a few strands that were sticking up, and he didn't pull hard at all. but i turned around and smacked him. hard. i regretted it as soon as i did it, but you can't take that back. it's just that when he pulled my hair, it brought back all the pain and humiliation and alienation that i went through in 8th grade etc crashing down on me. back then i had my hair pulled and whatnot so much without giving resistance that i started getting combative. you hurt me, i'll hurt you worse, etc. it's horrible. and i feel really bad about hitting him, but he ruined a good deal of the day for me. unintentionally. i hope he'll forgive me. i hope i can forgive myself.


in my cd player: spiderman 2 soundtrack. <3


confusion in her heart,
.anouk.

p.s. i made a super banner, but my computer's being wonky when i'm trying to resize it. meh, x.a.