...for one i love...

i've known you forever
and loved you for longer
but somehow i don't
think you feel the same
when we were small
we were the best of friends
and then
we grew
i still loved you
but you didn't know
how to see me
'cause i'm not a little girl
you turned to the others
the popular crowd
the ones you knew would flirt
and not look at you with eyes
brimming with the stinging
tears of truth
those are my eyes
you told these
these people
that you hated me
called me a bitch
when i heard of this
my heart clenched
and turned black
i died that day
but i came back
for not all my tears
were shed
we separated
i hardly see you now
and i thought that
i was over you
i could think of you
and not feel a thing
besides a vague feeling
of regret
but then when
the chance came that
i might see you
i found myself
dressing up
primping
for you
and then
i saw you and
my heart gave that familiar flutter
and you didn't see me
then again i saw you
and suddenly you were everywere
treating me with
indifference
and so that is what
i return to you
even though
inside i scream
what would happen
what would happen
if you saw me
for who i truly
am
?